A couple of weeks ago, I was thinking how to inspire my beautiful community on social media. A lovely idea came to my mind within a few minutes. I immediately created a beautiful collage and was ready to share it on social media. Then, suddenly, a particular person came to my mind, which I believed ‘would raise their eyebrows’ at my post and would think: “There we go again. Another one of Jana’s inspiring, self-help stuff.”
Within minutes, I began doubting myself and questioning the inspiring message I was so excited about just a minute ago. I decided not to post it. An hour went by and I thought: Isn’t that interesting? Why do we care so much about other’s opinions in a way we begin to doubt our creativity, ourselves?
In the end, I posted my inspiring message anyway and let the self-doubt fade away. And I also learned a lesson from this. It made me realise how much power I’m still wasting, by worrying what other people think of me, people who don’t really know me, my story and how hard I worked and I’m still working and how tired I am of seeking their approval.
So why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we strive to be so likeable and giving these people who don’t really matter so much of our precious energy? It’s because we have been programmed this way. There are rules we need to follow, certain standards to live by, success to strive for. And now, with the internet and especially social media, we feel even more pressure because we compare ourselves to others and what we believe their lives look like. Personally, I love social media, but unfortunately, the comparison that comes with it is doing more harm than good.
Do what feels right for you
Do what pleases you and forget about the rest. Easier said, then done, hmmmm? I know. But listen: Do you want to be always someone’s prisoner, always worry or obsess what they think? Of course not. Focus on you and do what makes you feel good and fulfils you. Leave their opinions and criticism to themselves.
And the truth is: they don’t really think about you, but are busy living their own lives
The amount of time and space we give others in our minds is absolutely crazy and completely unnecessary. Do yourself a favour and stop it at once. Everyone is living their own life, focusing, mainly, on themselves and their own things. They have their own worries, struggles and fears and are not really thinking about you and what you are up to. They are focused on their own lives.
Become more present
Being fully present prevents your mind from wandering to places that disempower you. Be aware of this and every time your thoughts start flying to places you don’t want to go, stop and ask yourself: Where am I? And of course, you know the answer, you are right here, right now at this moment. And this is the only place where the true life exists.