You are far too unique to be comparing yourself to others

In these times of digital age, we often think, how wonderful other people’s lives are when we look on social media. We see photos of luxurious holidays, flawless selfies of young women with perfect hair. We see inspiring men and women posting fitness videos and pictures in their workout gear and drinking green juices every morning to keep them looking young, healthy and beautiful.

Don’t get me wrong. I love social media and the age we live in. I often get inspired by other people’s sharings and it is through social media I’ve connected with so many incredible people around the entire world.

But being surrounded by all these amazing and flawless beings who are showing us their incredible lives, can make some of us wondering: Where’s my perfect body? Where is my beautiful skin? Where’s my money for all these dream holidays and helicopter rides?’ We begin to compare ourselves to these people and then we feel bad. The truth is, even their reality may not be the way they are presenting it on their social media accounts.

There are not many people who would talk about their struggles online, that they had a bad day or they’ve put on so much weight on in the last couple of months. Instead, people talk about their highlights, which is understandable. Who knows, they may be going through something difficult, we know nothing about, but would not share it publicly. Instead, they lift themselves up by posting something that helps them stay on a positive frequency. Of course, there are also people who like to show off to make others believe how incredible their lives are. But there are also so many genuine people who are just simply excited to share their happiness with others.

I recently read an article about a young model who would post a photo of herself on social media every single day. In that article, she described the whole experience as a rather daunting process. It would take her ages to get ready, take a selfie, airbrushing it and writing a catchy caption to ensure she gets many likes and followers. This always left her feeling exhausted and unfulfilled until she has changed her attitude towards it and started using social media differently.

I must admit, I also airbrushed some of my photos before. I’m still very particular what I post and how I present myself on the internet. But in the last couple of years, I am learning to be more raw and real, as well in photos, so in my articles. Since then, I’ve become to feel more at ease. When you are real, people can relate to you more. They don’t feel intimidated by you or feel bad that they don’t have it all figured out. Then, the comparison becomes irrelevant.

So my friends, let’s be more true to ourselves. Let’s stop comparing ourselves to all these ‘perfect’ people online. We are far too unique to be comparing ourselves to others. Let’s be more loving towards our beautiful selves and let’s stop putting so much pressure on them. Let’s be more authentic and show the world that it’s okay to be that way.


Are you letting the wrong people take up space in your mind?

A couple of weeks ago, I was thinking how to inspire my beautiful community on social media. A lovely idea came to my mind within a few minutes. I immediately created a beautiful collage and was ready to share it on social media. Then, suddenly, a particular person came to my mind, which I believed ‘would raise their eyebrows’ at my post and would think: There we go again. Another one of Jana’s inspiring, self-help stuff.”

Within minutes, I began doubting myself and questioning the inspiring message I was so excited about just a minute ago. I decided not to post it. An hour went by and I thought: Isn’t that interesting? Why do we care so much about other’s opinions in a way we begin to doubt our creativity, ourselves?

In the end, I posted my inspiring message anyway and let the self-doubt fade away. And I also learned a lesson from this. It made me realise how much power I’m still wasting, by worrying what other people think of me, people who don’t really know me, my story and how hard I worked and I’m still working and how tired I am of seeking their approval.

So why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we strive to be so likeable and giving these people who don’t really matter so much of our precious energy? It’s because we have been programmed this way. There are rules we need to follow, certain standards to live by, success to strive for. And now, with the internet and especially social media, we feel even more pressure because we compare ourselves to others and what we believe their lives look like. Personally, I love social media, but unfortunately, the comparison that comes with it is doing more harm than good.

Do what feels right for you

Do what pleases you and forget about the rest. Easier said, then done, hmmmm? I know. But listen: Do you want to be always someone’s prisoner, always worry or obsess what they think? Of course not. Focus on you and do what makes you feel good and fulfils you. Leave their opinions and criticism to themselves.

And the truth is: they don’t really think about you, but are busy living their own lives

The amount of time and space we give others in our minds is absolutely crazy and completely unnecessary. Do yourself a favour and stop it at once. Everyone is living their own life, focusing, mainly, on themselves and their own things. They have their own worries, struggles and fears and are not really thinking about you and what you are up to. They are focused on their own lives.

Become more present

Being fully present prevents your mind from wandering to places that disempower you. Be aware of this and every time your thoughts start flying to places you don’t want to go, stop and ask yourself: Where am I? And of course, you know the answer, you are right here, right now at this moment. And this is the only place where the true life exists.